Are you in the Gap or the Gain?

On my long drive across the country, I listened to "The Gap and The Gain," a book by Dan Sullivan and Dr. Benjamin Hardy. I was struck by how often we measure ourselves against a constantly moving target and how our judge and saboteurs are at play. Reading (or in my case, listening to) "The Gap and The Gain" helped me realize how measuring myself against what others are doing activates my FOMO and prevents me from focusing on my own desires and goals.

By shifting my focus to The Gain, I began to appreciate my journey and the progress I had made. This shift not only boosted my confidence but also reignited my passion for my goals. For instance, in my professional life, instead of dwelling on the things I hadn’t done, I started celebrating my commitment to renewing and starting new habits. This change in perspective made me more resilient and optimistic, enabling me to tackle new challenges with greater enthusiasm.

The Gap vs. The Gain

At the heart of the book is the concept of "The Gap" and "The Gain." These two mental frameworks represent different ways of measuring progress and success:

1. The Gap: This is where many of us find ourselves stuck. When in The Gap, we measure our success against an ideal or a future goal. This often leads to feelings of inadequacy and disappointment because the ideal is always shifting further away as we progress.

2. The Gain: In contrast, The Gain focuses on how far we've come rather than how far we have yet to go. By measuring backward and appreciating our progress, we foster a sense of accomplishment and motivation.

Why The Gain is Crucial

Focusing on The Gain has several profound benefits:

1. Positive Reinforcement: By celebrating our achievements, we reinforce positive behavior and cultivate a mindset of gratitude.

2. Increased Motivation: Recognizing progress fuels our motivation to continue moving forward.

3. Enhanced Well-being: Acknowledging how far we've come reduces stress and increases overall life satisfaction.

Practical Steps to Shift from The Gap to The Gain

Transitioning from The Gap to The Gain requires conscious effort and practice. Here are some actionable steps to make this shift:

1. Reflect Regularly: Set aside time each day or week to reflect on what you have achieved. Journaling can be an effective tool for this practice.

2. Set Milestones: Break your long-term goals into smaller, achievable milestones. Celebrate each milestone as a significant gain.

3. Express Gratitude: Cultivate a habit of gratitude by regularly listing things you are thankful for, including your own accomplishments and progress.

4. Reframe Challenges: View setbacks as learning opportunities and a part of your growth journey. Reflect on what these challenges have taught you and how they contribute to your overall progress.

5. Share Your Gains: Discuss your progress with friends, family, or mentors. Sharing your achievements can reinforce your gains and inspire others.